JCrowley's+Satyrical+Essay

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=**A Simple** Request= ==That Would Lead to Stopping the Continuance of the Deployment of American Soldiers from America and Elsewhere to the Nation of Iraq to Fight the War on Terror in the World By Sending Others to Do the Job For Us==

**By: JCrowley**
The War on Terrorism is a name given by America and its allies "to an outgoing campaign with the stated goal of 'ending international terrorism.'" It was immediately launched in response to the [|September 11, 2001 attacks] on the U.S, that al-Qaeda claimed responsibility for. The goals of the campaign include stopping terrorists from carrying out attacks and posing a threat to America and its allies. This War on Terror was launched by President George W. Bush with support from NATO and other allies. There have been many forms that the War on Terror has taken, including terror financing, domestic provisions that aim to prevent future attacks, and joint training and peacekeeping operations with a wide variety of nations. A problem, that many people of the involved nations in Iraq have regarded that the war is unwinnable, has no purpose, has parallels with the Vietnam War, is costing much financially, costing many lives, and it will be ended with the withdrawal of troops. In current news, President George Bush has called for an increase in the number of American troops stationed in Iraq.

The solution, as it may seem, is hard to come by. One, however can proclaim that the solution is to just simply "a-bomb" Iraq after we leave, yet technological advances in the world has lead to a stalemate in the "Total Destruction of Parts of another Nation idea." What can be done? It is simple. The problem is deploying our **//own//** soldiers, is it not? Well, why send our own troops? The best way to have a win-win situation between Congress and the people of the Nation would be to send soldiers we have no feelings for.

The easiest way for us to win would be to send our own kamikazes. Suffer no more America! Stop fighting your own battles! When you can send someone else to do it! Would **//you//** like to fight and die for your nation? Well, in theory yes, but when it really comes down to it, are we Americans not chickens? When did we get involved in the Second World War again? Very late! America had a significantly low amount of deaths and causalities compared to the allies it fought beside and especially the enemies it fought against. We are but a cowardly nation. Why not admit it? The only way we will be able to face our fears will be by sending others to do it for us.

Rather than continue fighting where we are, we must find weak and unstable countries. Those who are stuck in the past and whom are unable to come out of an economic depression would be of great value to the U.S. of A! What must be done: Capture as many foreigners as we possibly can. Any low life civilian we can possibly find that we have no concern for, whether it is Jew, Black, Mexican, or Asian. We next force them to fight in **//our//** name and hope that they survive long enough for us to get more to deploy. However, if they eventually all die out then we can just go back to their weak countries where they come from and pull more of them out; women, children, the elderly, cripples, it's all good!

For example, the kamikazes of Japan flew their planes into anything American-made. They died, but they killed some of us in the process. Well, this is basically what we are doing. Except we will not be fighting at all. Although we will probably need some cameras crews to catch the good footage, so we can sit back at home with our plasma screens, eating popcorn or snacks, and retain the title of being the fattest country in the world. In addition, the elderly, women, and children of these countries we will take over, can strap themselves in bombs and run will nilly into Iraqi soldiers, exploding everyone but us in the process.

It is the only way to pull in all our troops from Iraq. If this plan were to take place, we could all hug and hold on to our loved ones before they become our lost ones. By sending our backup army, we will not only save lives, but we also save money. It's not like our new band of soldiers need clothes while they are fighting, right? Whoever said you need to be clothed when you are about to be bombed? Plus, whatever clothes our new soldiers come into our army with can be taken away and given to the more needy Americans. As it can be seen, this plan will also help raise the spirits of our poor orphans and street bums.

A bit far fetched, huh? Well, some believe that this plan is a bit on the "crazy" side. Yeah, weird, huh? Well, many have come together and agreed that this plan is "inconsiderate" and "inhumane." Well, that's agreeable. Is it not also "inhumane and "inconsiderate" to send our **//own//** troops to do the job? President Bush would like to risk the lives of his many loyal citizens to fight the supposed War on Terror, although there are fewer tears dropped compared to sending low Jews, Blacks, Mexicans, and Asians.

To conclude, we should not fight this war alone. Actually, we should not fight it at all. We must not let any more American blood drop on Iraqi soil. It is a disgrace to die fighting in an inferior country as Iraq and much worse to touch even laid a foot in it. Have no concerns America! We shall fight no more. Pulling out our own soldiers and defeating and abolishing terrorism will be two goals we can all achieve. Worry no more.

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